Secret To Success Comic Strips

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258 Results for Secret To Success

View 1 - 10 results for secret to success comic strips. Discover the best "Secret To Success" comics from Dilbert.com.

Fifty Tips For Success

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Fifty Tips For Success - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 14, 2015's comic on:


Tags #Advice, #career advice, #obliviousness, #secret, #success, #tech millionaire

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Asok: A 27-year-old tech millionaire published his list of fifty things you need to do to succeed. Dilbert: In other words, he has no idea why he succeeded. Asok: Sure he does. He even has a chart of his top thirty... priorities. Okay, I hear it now.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 11, 2013's comic on:


Tags #honesty, #managers & supervisors, #secret of success, #plan b, #two hairballs, #business

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Boss: Asok, the secret to success is making your boss look good. Asok: What if my boss looks like two hairballs on an infected bladder? There's no way to make that look good. Boss: You're not off to a strong start. Asok: Please tell me there's a Plan B.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 19, 2014's comic on:


Tags #thinking, #secret to success, #keeping things simple, #absolute, #realtive, #alternatives

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Boss: The secret to success is keeping things simple. Dilbert: Do you mean simple in an absolute sense or relative to the alternatives? Boss: It depends on the situation. Dilbert: Sounds complicated.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 07, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #pants, #twelve-inch, #waist, #inches, #secret, #retail, #success, #merchandise, #shop, #harder, #retail store

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Dilbert asks a salesclerk in a clothing store, "Excuse me, do you have any pants that AREN'T a twelve-inch waist and fifty inches long?" Dilbert holds up a pair of tiny pants and says, "I ask because there are no human beings who could wear these pants, and one of the secrets of retail success is to stock merchandise that somebody might want." Dilbert continues, "Then people would shop here and actually BUY things." The clerk replies, "Wow, that's way harder than what we do."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 29, 2013's comic on:


Tags #conversation, #prosperity, #secret to usccess, #eating bread, #follow your passion

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Boss: Asok, the secret to success is to do what you love and stick to it. Asok: I like eating bread. Boss: Exactly! Follow your passion. Six Months Later Asok: Maybe I should try something else. Boss: Quitter.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 21, 2013's comic on:


Tags #excitement, #flattery, #respect, #companys success

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Customer Meeting CEO: The secret of our company's success is that we hire good people. Dilbert: What? Are you saying I'm good? I've never heard a compliment at work. What is that feeling inside me? Is it the thing called self-esteem? Customer: Awkward. CEO: Just ignore him. Dilbert: Behold my goodness!

Success Is About Who You Know

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Success Is About Who You Know - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 28, 2015's comic on:


Tags #blame, #blaming, #success, #who you know

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Wally: Success is all about who you know. I'm not successful, so apparently it doesn't help to know you. Dilbert: I"m sorry I let you down. Wally: It's as if you aren't even trying.

Hire Smarter People

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Hire Smarter People - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 28, 2015's comic on:


Tags #leadership, #success, #insult, #power, #compliment, #backhanded compliment, #ego, #humility, #humble

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CEO: The secret to my success is that I hire people who are smarter than me. And then I tell those smart people exactly what to do. It keeps you humble. Dilbert: Good, because all of this was starting to go to my head.

Being The Best

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Being The Best - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 05, 2016's comic on:


Tags #Advice, #failure, #guest artist, #motivation, #pep talk, #success, #john glynn

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CEO: The secret to success is finding one thing at which you can be the best. Dilbert: What are you the best at? CEO: I'm the best at motivating people. Dilbert: Yay! I can't wait for that to start.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 12, 2011's comic on:


Tags #dating, #inventions, #dead end job, #developing an app, #spare time, #lottery ticket, #odds of success, #relationships

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Dilbert says, "It might look as if I'm in a dead-end job, but I'm developing an app in my spare time." Woman says, "Here's a lottery ticket. I just doubled your odds of success." Woman says, "I bought two for myself so I don't need to make an app."