Slapping Drunk Comic Strips
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30 Results for Slapping Drunk
View 1 - 10 results for slapping drunk comic strips. Discover the best "Slapping Drunk" comics from Dilbert.com.
Friday January 11,
2002
Tags #job as waiter, #job as engineer, #qualified, #manager, #slapping drunk
Transcript
Dilbert and Dogbert are sitting at the kitchen table drinking coffee. Dilbert says, "Maybe I'll take a job as a waiter until I can get a job as an engineer." Dogbert replies, "You're not qualified to wait on tables." Dilbert responds, "How hard could it be?" A waiter is juggling dishes unsteadily. He says to Dilbert, "The manager is over there slapping a drunk."
Wednesday February 29,
2012
Tags #internet & world wide web, #quick question, #only on line, #slapping, #less risk, #dumb thing
Transcript
Tina: Wally, I have a quick question. Wally: Hold it. Stop right there. I only collaborate online, where there's less risk of some angry nut job slapping me. Tina: That's the dumbest thing... Wally: Gaaa!
Tuesday January 21,
1992
Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #execute, #stock, #transactions, #pc, #insider, #sixty million, #slapping, #rolled, #newspaper
Transcript
Dogbert stands at a desk and works on a computer as Dilbert watches from behind. Dogbert says, "I can execute my stock transactions on-line with the PC." Dogbert stops typing and says, "There . . . My insider trading netted another sixty million dollars." Dilbert shakes his finger at Dogbert and says, "Bad dog!" Dilbert turns toward the reader and says, "I suppose it's too late to try slapping him with a rolled-up newspaper."
Monday March 06,
1995
Tags #week behind, #poor leadership, #drained, #parents, #accept some resposibility, #creating you, #parents drunk
Transcript
The Boss enters Dilbert's cubicle and asks, "Can you explain why you're a week behind schedule?" Dilbert turns to face the Boss and says, "Your poor leadership has drained me of the enthusiasm that is necessary to succeed. But it's not completely YOUR fault." Dilbert continues, "Frankly, your parents have to accept some responsibility for creating you." The Boss asks, "Even if they were drunk?"
Sunday January 04,
1998
Tags #drunk, #out of control, #on a date, #can't get date, #whose idea
Transcript
Dilbert, dressed in a coat, is strolling with Dogbert. Dilbert says, "I'll never get drunk. I don't want to be out of control." Dogert asks, "Are you in control at work?" Dilbert answers, "Well.....no." Dogbert asks, "Are you in control when you're on a date?" Dilbert responds, "I can't get a date." Dogbert continues, "And whose idea was it to go on this walk?" Dilbert answers,"Yours." Dilbert lifts Dogbert up on a rock to sit. Dilbert asks, "Are you saying that I should get drunk?" Dogbert answers, "No,no." Dogbert continues, "I'm saying the decision will be made by the beer companies." A seated Dilbert responds, "I hope they say that it's okay."
Wednesday May 23,
2001
Tags #bar, #burp, #chug chardonnay, #drinks, #drunk, #drunkards, #gross, #guzzled, #hit on, #pig, #scene, #sloshed, #slurred words, #strictly business, #business man, #date, #animals
Transcript
Alice and a businessman sit at a bar. Alice says, "This is strictly business, right? We're going to talk about your company's product." The businessman raises his glass to Alice and says, "I bet I can drink for chardonnay than you can." Later, Alice's hair is completely dishevelled and both Alice and the businessman are slumped in their chairs, totally drunk. Alice says, "You're a hanshum man and so ish your twin bruver." The business man burps loudly.
Saturday January 12,
2002
Tags #server job, #abusive customer, #kindness, #tablecloth
Transcript
The manager is slapping a drunk. Dilbert says to her, "Hi. I came to apply for a server job." The manager replies, "Okay. Tell me how you would handle an abusive drunken customer like this guy." Dilbert replies, "Um.. with kindness?" The manager says, "You might want to shield yourself with a tablecloth."
Friday October 08,
2004
Tags #problem, #plan, #negativity, #only person, #my theory, #rest, #morons, #sober, #drunk
Transcript
"I see a problem with your plan." "Oh, do you, Mr. Negativity?" "Why is it that you're the o-o-o-only person in this meeting to see a problem? Huh? Huh?" "My theory is that the rest of you are either morons or drunk." "I am totally sober!"
Friday December 19,
2008
Tags #blame, #business failures/bankruptcies, #scapegoat, #troll to scapegoat, #goat costume, #take balme, #another deadline, #slapping goat
Transcript
The boss: I'm promoting you from legacy systems troll to scapegoat. Your job is to dress in a goat costume and take the blame for all of our projects failing. Ted: We milled another deadline. All in favor of slapping the goat...
Tuesday September 14,
2010
Tags #meeting, #facebook, #twitter, #marketing, #social media, #new employee, #coworker, #cats, #drunk, #stupid, #business, #technology
Transcript
Beth says, "As the marketing manager for social media, my job is to use these two words a lot." Beth says, "Marketing through social media is like herding cats. And just to make it interesting, many of the cats are drunk and stupid." Dilbert says, "Burn." Catbert says, "I am totally defriending that witch."