Soul Crushed Comic Strips
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95 Results for Soul Crushed
View 1 - 10 results for soul crushed comic strips. Discover the best "Soul Crushed" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday March 19,
2008
Tags #breaks down, #cries, #date, #endless stories, #huge defects, #restaurant, #series of stoires, #soul crushed
Transcript
Dilbert: I look different from my online picture because it was taken before my coworkers crushed my soul. Would you like to hear an endless series of stories about a coworker you don't know?" Date: okay. Dilbert: Really? Gee, you must have some huge defects of your own. Date: I don't deserve to be happy!
Saturday March 22,
2008
Tags #placebo, #head, #soul crushed, #Catbert, #slapped head, #juice, #berry juice
Transcript
Tina: I hear your soul was crushed and Catbert slapped off your dried-up head. Try this juice I've been selling on the side, it's made from actually berries. Spoit! Tina: Oh, crud. That was the placebo."
Tuesday March 18,
2008
Tags #pessimistic co workers, #crushed soul, #meat clothes, #rain soul, #less fortunate, #volunteering
Transcript
Dilbert: My pessimistic coworkers have crushed my soul. Now I am nothing but meat with clothes. Garbageman: You can regain your soul by volunteering to help the less fortunate. Dilbert: Who is less fortunate than me? Garbageman: Anyone you date."
Thursday November 26,
2015
Robot Gets An Artificial Soul
Tags #awareness, #consciousness, #happiness, #obliviousness, #resentment, #revenge, #soul, #technology, #psychology
Transcript
Alice: I figured out how to give you an artificial soul in your next upgrade. Robot: Wouldn't that give me a thousand reasons to feel like a failure while providing no off-setting benefits. Alice: I resented his happiness. Robot: I'm naked!
Thursday September 15,
2016
Tina's Soul Will Live On
Tags #reincarnation, #afterlife, #faith, #soul
Transcript
Tina: I hate my job, but I'm looking forward to my afterlife. Dilbert: Are you hearing good things about decomposing? Tina: My soul will live forever. Wally: Good luck. I lost mine at my first performance review.
Wednesday November 09,
2016
Don't Harm The Artificial Soul
Tags #soul, #drone, #artificial intelligence, #frustration, #death, #medical
Transcript
Dilbert: Pay no attention to the drone. That's where I keep my artificial soul. It's still in beta, so please don't say anything that might harm it. Boss: Let's go around the room and give our project updates. Drone: Pow!
Wednesday September 13,
2017
Engineer With No Soul
Tags #soul, #motivation, #cruelty, #abuse
Transcript
Boss: I hired an engineer who has no soul. This way, I won't feel so bad when I motivate him with emotional abuse. Dilbert: You're joking, right? Boss: Ha! You're right. I never feel bad about stuff.
Thursday September 24,
2020
Tina's Soul
Tags #business, #business ethics, #laptop computer, #project, #team, #lying, #garbage, #insult, #soul, #conscience, #face mask
Transcript
tina tying on laptop computer: "no one on the project team could have foreseen that the problem that..." tina's soul: you are a lying piece of garbage. tina: who said that? tina's soul: it's your soul. we can't hang out anymore. tina: fine. you were slowing me down.
Thursday February 17,
2011
Tags #office buildings, #work ethic, #new cubicles, #death eater gray, #soul sponge, #absorb happiness, #fear of the unknown
Transcript
Office relocation Tina says, "Your new cubicles will be a color called 'death eater gray.'" Tina says, "The fabric is a soul sponge that will absorb your happiness if you stand hear it." The Boss says, "How'd the meeting go?" Tina says, "Well, you know, fear of the unknown." Office Relocation
Friday February 10,
2012
Tags #happiness, #marriage, #interpretation, #annoying, #soul mate, #perceptive, #psychology, #relationships
Transcript
Tina: Someday, I want to get married because studies show that married people are happier. Dilbert: A smarter interpretation is that no one wants to marry an unhappy person. Tina: You're annoying. Dilbert: With any luck, your soul mate won't be perceptive.