Special Project Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

749 Results for Special Project

View 1 - 10 results for special project comic strips. Discover the best "Special Project" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 12, 1993's comic on:

Tags #the boss, #Wally, #Dilbert, #ed, #business meeting, #business project

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and Wally watch the Boss tell Ed, "Nervous Ed, I'm assigning you to a special project." Nervous Ed pulls his tie and replies, "Special assignment? That means you don't have any real work for me." Nervous Ed continues, "Everybody knows that a special assignment is a kiss of death." The Boss continues, "You'll be sharing a cubicle with six other employees who are also on special assignment." Nervous Ed looks scared and thinks, "Don't panic yet . . . Maybe it's something important . . . Maybe it's something that could make an impact." The Boss says, "Your assignment is to improve employee empowerment." Nervous Ed looks shocked. Nervous Ed convulses and faints. Wally tells the Boss, "Thanks for letting us watch." The Boss asks, "Did you like the part about six in the cubicle?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 26, 2005's comic on:

Tags #cubicle cockroach, #can't be killed, #eternal, #special prokject

View Transcript

Transcript

"Ha ha! I'm the Cubicle Cockroach that cannot be destroyed!" "Once hired, nothing can remove me from my cubicle. I am eternal! Ha ha!" "I'm moving you to a special project." "Erk!!!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 09, 2010's comic on:

Tags #special project, #secret, #confidential, #dig grave, #shovel, #death, #medical

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "I need you to work on a highly confidential project." The Boss says, "When you're done, I want you to dig your own shallow grave and beat yourself to death with the shovel." Dilbert says, "Why does it feel as if my entire career has been preparation for this project?" The Boss says, "You're welcome."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 10, 2010's comic on:

Tags #special project, #secret, #confidential, #idiot, #question, #placebo

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says, "I need answers to these questions for a confidential project. I can't tell you more." Coworker says, "I'm a complete idiot and even I can deduce from your questions what the project must be." Dilbert says, "I anticipated that, so some of you idiots are getting placebo questions." Coworker says, "Well played."

What Phase Of The Project

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
What Phase Of The Project - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 26, 2015's comic on:

Tags #insult, #insulting, #project, #questioning

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: What phase is your project in? Dilbert: This is the phase where people ask stupid questions. Boss: How long does it last? Dilbert: It isn't looking good for today.

Dilbert Characters

Wally Heads Up Ai Project

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally Heads Up Ai Project - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 20, 2016's comic on:

Tags #work ethic, #laziness, #project, #fake

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Wally, I need you to head up our artificial intelligence project. You will have no budget and no hope of success. I just like saying we're working on AI. And you're completely useless, so it's a good match. Wally: I won't let you down.

Coworkers Who Are Special

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Coworkers Who Are Special - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 12, 2018's comic on:

Tags #consultation, #insults, #fired, #pay, #Advice, #special, #compliment

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert Consults Never call your co-worker a colossal moron, That could get you fired. Instead , say, "well, aren't you special" Dilbert: Are we paying you for this advice? Dogbert: well, aren't you special.

Project Update

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Project Update - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 24, 2019's comic on:

Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #project, #update, #plan, #read, #imaginary

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: did you send me your project update? dilbert: were you planning to read it? boss: no dilbert: then i totally sent it too you boss thinking: half of my job is imaginary

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 13, 2011's comic on:

Tags #administrative agencies, #project timeline, #waste one week, #set up meeting, #available in a week

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I estimated the project timeline by assuming that everyone involved will waste one week. Boss: That's a stupid way to do a timeline. Set up a meeting and I'll show you how it's supposed to be done. Carol: He's available in a week.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 15, 2011's comic on:

Tags #cruelty, #managers & supervisors, #couldn't be worse, #bad idea, #Funny, #project is bad idea, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "How's everything going?" Dilbert says, "It couldn't be worse." Dilbert says, "I was the only person who said this project is a bad idea. Then you assigned it to me." The Boss says, "It's funnier when I make them say it." Dilbert says, "Grrrr"