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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 11, 1990's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #nasa, #shuttle, #specific, #duties, #video, #risky, #experiment, #ideas

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Nasa Scientist 1: You will be with one other... Uh... Astronaut in a private room. You two will have no specific duties on this mission. I'll be monitoring you on video. Nasa Scientist 2: A nerd, a monkey, and one Nintendo at zero gravity... Pretty risky experiment. Nasa Scientist 1: To be honest, we were running low on good ideas.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 29, 1992's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #garbageman, #home, #specific, #except, #campaign

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The garbage man says to Dogbert, "The key to winning the election is voter turnout." The garbage man continues, "To be specific, you want everybody to stay home except you." The garbage man holds up a poster and says, "I've worked up a little ad campaign." The poster has a picture of a man with his tongue hanging out of his mouth. The poster says, "He touched the voting booth before you did and he never washes his hands."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 26, 1992's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #meeting, #agenda, #specific, #emotional, #statements, #work

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Dilbert, Ted and a woman sit at a conference table. Ted says, "Thank you all for coming. There's no specific agenda for this meeting . . ." Ted continues, "As usual, we'll just make unrelated emotional statements about things which bother us. I'll kick it off . . ." Ted throws his head back and yells, "There's never time to get any work done around here!!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 24, 1997's comic on:


Tags #be specific, #bounus, #congratulations, #expect bonus, #good work, #act randomly

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The Boss says, "Alice, here's a bonus for your good work." Alice asks, "On what?" The Boss says, "I can't be specific, because then you might do it again and expect another bonus." Alice says, "Congratulations; you've motivated me to act randomly." The Boss points and says, "I'm going over here and I don't know why."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 06, 1998's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #deny request, #evil incarnate, #something specific, #dollar estimate, #value, #chair, #quantify job, #work tools

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Dilbert approaches a worker sitting at his desk. He is holding a piece of paper and says, "Why did the I.S. department deny my request for a P.C. upgrade?" The worker holds up his arms and shouts, "Because we are evil incarnate! BUWAHAHAHA!!" Dilbert says, "I was looking for something more specific." The worker holds out the paper and says, "You didn't provide a dollar estimate of the benefits." Dilbert says, "That's ridiculous. I can't put a value on every tool I need to do my job." The worker sits back in his chair with his arms folded and says, "If you can't quantify it, then it must not be necessary." Dilbert throws up his hands and says, "Then why does the company give me a chair? I can't quantify that either." Dilbert sits on the floor of his cubicle, without a chair. He thinks, "Here's one more reason why it stinks to be me."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 07, 2001's comic on:


Tags #own cubicle, #highschool reunion, #adults, #more specific

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HIGH SCHOOL REUNION: Talking to a woman at his high school reunion, Dilbert says, "I started with nothing. Now I have my own cubicle." Dilbert says to the woman, "Say, now that we're both adults, would you like to... You know?" The woman says, "Yes." People at the high school reunion stare at Dilbert, who has his underwear pulled up over the back of his head. Dilbert thinks, "I've got to be more specific."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 22, 2003's comic on:


Tags #more with less, #motivation, #communication, #more specific

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The Boss: Our goal is to do more with less. Wally: Less motivation? The Boss: I can't be more specific. wally: Less communication?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 30, 2008's comic on:


Tags #boss, #lazy, #specific, #understand, #quibbled about methodology, #bought crickets, #wait for answer, #borrow crisckets

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The boss: Uh-oh. I don't understand a word of this. What did other people say about it? Dilbert: A few people quibbles about the methodology. The boss: Right, well, yes, the methodology does have a few issues. Dilbert: Can you be more specific? I brought some crickets to keep me company while I wait for your answer. chirp chirp chirp chirp Alice: I'm up next. Can I borrow the crickets? Dilbert: They're a little tired.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 23, 2013's comic on:


Tags #discussion, #dress for the job, #dress for the job you want, #fault, #guilt, #more specific, #naked, #clothes, #work

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Boss: When I said you should dress for the job you want, not the job you have... I shouldn't have needed to be more specific than that. Wally: You have a way of making everything sound like it's my fault.

Death In The Family

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Death In The Family - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 02, 2018's comic on:


Tags #carol, #Catbert, #death, #Family, #dies, #specific

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Carol: Can I take time off for a death in the family? Catbert: Well, it depends who dies. Carol: Can you be more specific? Catbert: It has to be you.