Search Results for "switch to decaf"
Share June 19, 2003's comic on:
Carol is sitting on a doctor's examination table. The doctor says, "Switch to decaf for a while. That should help." Back at the office, Alice holds bag of coffee in her hands and thinks, "I'll replace all the office coffee with decaf for my convenience." In the hallway, The Boss, Alice, and Dilbert are all asleep on the floor. Wally is slumped down; he thinks, "Must...find... antidote."
Share February 04, 2002's comic on:
Headline: Dogbert Tech Support. Dogbert is talking into a telephone headset. He says, "Your software is worn out. You must be typing too hard." Dogbert continues, "Switch to decaf, paint your walls pink and stop going to the gym." Dilbert approaches Dogbert and says, "I've never heard of holistic tech support." Dogbert replies, "Maybe you should read more."
Share March 16, 2006's comic on:
Share September 12, 2017's comic on:
Alice: I've never seen you take a vacation. Wally: I take mental vacations. All I do is switch to decaf. After a few hours, I can't remember what country I'm in. Alice: Sounds dumb. Is the any downside? Wally: The locals could be friendlier.
Share February 11, 2012's comic on:
Boss: I'm getting reports that you're being arrogant in meetings. Dilbert: That's because I have a deep understanding of technology and a moral obligation to keep simpletons from ruining the world. Boss: Maybe you could tone it down. Dilbert: There's no kill switch on awesome.
Share January 11, 1992's comic on:
Dilbert walks toward a ringing phone. A voice on the telephone says, "Hello! This is a long-distance phone company with vague promises of unverifiable savings if you switch to us." The voice asks, "Is this an inconvenient time for you?" Dilbert replies, "No." The voice says, "Oh, then we'll call back later."
Share September 06, 1992's comic on:
Dilbert stands in front of an overhead projector. He says, ". . . Therefore, I recommend that we switch to the new technology . . . Any questions?" A man sitting at the conference table asks, "Dilbert, are you willing to bet your career on this?" Dilbert replies, "Yes, I would definitely bet my career." Dilbert continues, "You would too if you had MY career." Dilbert places a transparency on the projector and says, "I have a view graph which anticipated your question." Dilbert points to the diagram and says, "This chart tracks my declining sense of self-worth as my career progresses." Dilbert continues, "At the low-point, here, I'm reduced to answering imbecilic questions while pointing a little stick at the wall." Dilbert arrives at home and Dogbert asks, "How did the presentation go?" Dilbert replies, "There's such a thing as being too prepared."
Share November 27, 1999's comic on:
The Turnaround CEO The devilish CEO says to Dilbert, "The turnaround is complete. I'm off to my new job." He continues, "It's a meat packing house that need to reduce overhead." Still talking, "I figure I can switch a few room signs and finish in an afternoon."
Share December 04, 1999's comic on:
Wally is holding up a book and walking with Dilbert and says: "I found a book about astral projection." Wally walks into a meeting room, followed by Dilbert, and says:"I'm gonna try this during our meeting." Wally is sitting at the meeting between two women grinding his teeth and hitting his fists against the table. One of the women says: "Does anyone want to switch chairs?"
Share January 01, 2000's comic on:
The boss, Wally, Dilbert and a new consultant are in a meeting. The boss says: "I hired the "Bait and Switch" consulting group because they're so smart." The consultant says to the boss while introducing him to a very messy looking man: "I'm assigning Eddie to work on your account. You will never see me again." Eddie sits in front of the boss and says: "So, what is it that you do here?"