Syndrome Comic Strips
10 Results for Syndrome
View 1 - 10 results for syndrome comic strips. Discover the best "Syndrome" comics from Dilbert.com.
boss: i have a bad case of imposter syndrome. i feel as if i'm only pretending to be a good manager, and someday everyone will find out it's an act. dilbert: if it makes you feel any better, we figured that out a while ago.
Boss: Who wants to hear about my golf game? Alice: Maybe someone with locked-in syndrome who doesn't get any visitors. Boss: Just for that, I'm going to tell you twice. Alice: No, please. I'll do anything.
Doctor: You've got a bad case of carpal punchel syndrome. Doctor: Don't use your "fist of death" for a few weeks. Alice: GAAA!!! Wally: the "Foot of death" is not the same. Asok: It is only slightly menacing.
Doctor: You've got a bad case of smartphone syndrome. One of hundred percent of your mental and physical problems are caused by using your phone too much. I don't feel as if I'm getting through to you. Alice texting: She's still talking. LOL.
Asok says, "I thought my Elbonian kidnappers would hold me forever because you refused to pay the ransom." Asok says, "Then the Stockholm effect kicked in. I started identifying with my captors and beating myself." The Boss says, "And they let you go?" Asok says, "Apparently it looked contagious."
Employee: So now I have carpal tunnel syndrome... The Boss: ZZZZ Employee: you don't care about the health of your employees! All you care about is money!! The Boss: money? Employee: I need surgery! Im in constant again!! The boss: False alarm. zzz
Dilbert lies on a couch in a therapist's office. Dilbert says, "On weekends I'll feel my pager vibrate . . . But when I go to check it, I realize I'm not wearing it." The psychologist replies, "It's a classic case of phantom-pager syndrome. It's common among technology workers." The psychiatrist adds, "There's no treatment for it." Dilbert says, "I don't want to treat it. I want to relocate it."
Dilbert sees a co-worker whose hair stands straight up. Dilbert asks, "What's wrong with you?" The man replies, "I have A.W.S." Dilbert asks, "You have 'Attractive Woman Syndrome' HERE??" The man replies, "She was just hired." The man shouts, "Run!" The Boss approaches and says, "Dilbert, I'd like you to meet Liz." Dilbert thinks, "Uh-oh . . . My metabolism is increasing. My brain is suppressing what little social skills I have." The woman says, "Hi." Dilbert extends his hand and says, "It's a pleasure to meet me. I hope you never find a live turtle in your soup." Sweat flies off Dilbert's forehead. Dilbert covers his face with a piece of paper and thinks, "Aaagh! What was that supposed to mean??" Liz looks scared. The paper sticks to Dilbert's face and he thinks, "Oh great . . . The correction fluid wasn't dry. It's stuck to my eyebrows." Dilbert arrives at home with the document still stuck to his face. He asks Dogbert, "What can I do to stop frightening attractive women?" Dogbert replies, "That mask is a step in the right direction."
Man says, "My prescription meds cause drowsiness." Man says, "So I got a second prescription that causes phantom-hand syndrome to slap me at random intervals." Alice says, "Maybe you should use a doctor who has less-effective pharmaceutical reps in his territory." Man says, "Fist!"
boss: i hired a sadist to design our user interfaces. i realize this isn't ideal, but no one else wanted the job. dilbert: why would our customers buy a product designed by a sadist? boss: it's called stockholm syndrome.