Taking Long Comic Strips
455 Results for Taking Long
View 1 - 10 results for taking long comic strips. Discover the best "Taking Long" comics from Dilbert.com.
Share August 24, 1995's comic on:
Dilbert is tied up and hanging upside down. A demonlike clerk says to him, "You spent nearly $10 per day on meals during your trip." The clerk continues, "The travel guidelines require you to stun a pigeon with your briefcase on the way to the hotel then fry it up on your travel iron." Dilbert responds, "I tried . . . but it was taking so long." The clerk suggests, "Try the 'wool' setting."
Share October 19, 2013's comic on:
Boss: Why is your project taking longer than expected? Dilbert: It's only taking longer than dumb people expected. Boss: Still, that's a lot of people. Dilbert: What can I say to make this conversation end?
Share August 25, 2015's comic on:
Boss: My new thing is taking long walks instead of having meetings. Wow. It is hard to walk, read, think, talk, and drink coffee at the same time. Dilbert: He fell off a bridge. Carol: That's why I schedule walking meetings for him.
Share November 16, 1992's comic on:
Dogbert sits on the hassock watching tv. A newscaster says, "The tiny nation of Elbonia erupted in civil war." In Elbonia, a television reporter holds a microphone toward two Elbonians and asks, "What caused you to turn your weapons on your own people?" One Elbonian asks, "Weapons? We can use weapons?" The other Elbonian puts his hands on his hips and says, "Well, no wonder it was taking so long."
Share April 20, 2010's comic on:
The Boss says, "What's taking you so long to fix the control management system?" Dilbert says, "Your leadership has taught me to give you laughably unrealistic timelines, then blame others when I miss deadlines." The Boss says, "You're not even doing that right." Dilbert says, "I guess I need more of your leadership."
Share April 23, 2011's comic on:
Ted: The committee decided that the file naming convention will start with the date, in the order of month, year, day... then a space, then the temperature at the airport, and the hat size of the nearest squirrel. To be perfectly honest, it was a long meeting and we probably didn't do our best work toward the end.
Share September 06, 2011's comic on:
Interview Alice: Can you work long hours if needed? Man: Yes. It's normal for me to work 14 hours a day. Alice: Research shows that working long hours causes people to make bad decisions. So we know you're a bad decision maker. Are you a good communicator? Man: Is the right answer "no"?
Share September 09, 2011's comic on:
Dilbert: Did you read my technical recommendation? Boss: No. It's too long and complicated. Dilbert: How do you plan to make a decision without reading it? Boss: I'll use my gut. Dilbert: It's probably a good idea to keep your brain out of this. Boss: Quiet! It's saying something. Noise: GROWL.
Share October 19, 2011's comic on:
Share February 28, 2012's comic on:
Wally: I'm designing a suite of internet collaboration tools. It's part of my long-term goal to eliminate all forms of direct human contact. Co-worker: That's messed up. Wally: You're exactly what I'm trying to avoid.