Talking Alarm Comic Strips
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278 Results for Talking Alarm
View 1 - 10 results for talking alarm comic strips. Discover the best "Talking Alarm" comics from Dilbert.com.
Monday October 29,
2001
Tags #talking clock, #after midnight, #talking alarm
Transcript
Dilbert is sitting at his computer. The Boss approaches from behind and says, "My home phone turns into a talking clock after midnight." Dilbert turns slightly. The Boss continues, "Yeah, I didn't believe it either until Wally taught me how to use it." The Boss is at home. A voice from his phone yells, "It's 3:14 in the morning you #%*!* idiot!" The Boss thinks to himself, "Yup."
Tuesday March 02,
2021
Talking To Wally
Tags #mental health, #office workers, #health, #alone time, #listen, #crazy, #hate, #talking, #fake, #empathy, #business, #coffee
Transcript
dilbert: dogbert doesn't believe me when i tell him i need more alone time for my mental health. wally: why would he listen to you when you're obviously crazy? dilbert: i hate talking to you. wally: should i fake more empathy.
Thursday June 23,
2011
Tags #crimes, #internet & world wide web, #black hat, #websites ranking, #search engine, #unethical, #near certainty, #loserish, #talking
Transcript
Boss: I want you to use "black hat" methods to raise our website's ranking on search engines. Dilbert: What do you like best about that idea - the fact that it's unethical or the near certainty of getting caught? Boss: That's sort of a loserish thing to say. Dilbert: Talking doesn't work for people like me.
Tuesday August 09,
2011
Tags #gloating, #meetings, #non stop talking, #trophy, #participating, #too much self esteem
Transcript
Dilbert: We're out of time and we accomplished absolutely nothing, thanks to your non-stop talking. Coworker: When do I get my trophy for participating? Dilbert: Someone was raised with too much self-esteem. Coworker: Watch me walk!
Wednesday August 24,
2011
Tags #anxiety, #conversation, #discussion, #valuable input, #hear alarm
Transcript
Boss: When are you meeting with the customer? I'll join you to add my valuable input. Noise: Slurp. Dilbert: Does everyone hear that alarm or is it only in my head? Boss: I can stay all afternoon.
Friday October 21,
2011
Tags #blazers, #buying work clothes, #female, #men's clothing, #pantsuit talking, #unisex store, #unisex suit, #women suits
Transcript
Wally: I'm buying my work clothes at the unisex suit store. Dilbert: There's no such thing a unisex suit store. Wally: You always have to be right. Dilbert: That's the pantsuit talking.
Monday April 09,
2012
Tags #Family, #work from home, #2 days err week, #reduce carbon foorprint, #wife, #small children, #egg carton, #talking to moron, #relationships
Transcript
Boss: I want you to work from home for two days per week to reduce our carbon footprint. Employee: Nooooo! My wife and three small children are in that house. They're always mean to me. Boss: How bad could it be? Employee: Let me put it this way: I'm sitting in an egg carton and talking to a moron, and this is better.
Friday September 15,
1989
Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #social anxiety, #fire alarm, #manners, #grins
Transcript
Dilbert walks down the hallway thinking, "Oh, crap. This is the third time today that I will walk by this same guy in the hall. I barely know him." Dilbert continues thinking, "This is so awkward. The first time, I said 'hello.' The second time we both made those closed-mouth grins and arched our eyebrows. What do I do the third time?" Back at home, Dilbert tells Dogbert, ". . . So I pulled the fire alarm." Dogbert says, "I don't think Miss Manners is gonna back you on this one."
Wednesday November 08,
1989
Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #talking, #world hunger, #policies, #bumper sticker, #debate
Transcript
Dilbert says to Dogbert, "I've decided it's time to stop talking about world hunger and start DOING something!" Dilbert continues, "Let others debate policies. My time to act is now." Dogbert asks, "You're going to buy a smarmy bumper sticker, aren't you?" Dilbert replies, "Darn straight."
Wednesday February 21,
1990
Tags #Dilbert, #working, #reference, #inadequate, #talking, #pages
Transcript
Dilbert sits at a table in a restaurant with a woman who has a huge head. Dilbert asks, "So, uh . . . How do you like working at the library reference desk?" The woman replies, "It's pretty good, now that I've memorized all the books. No more flipping through pages . . ." Dilbert says, "I'm feeling a bit inadequate at the moment." The woman replies, "Don't worry. I'll just think about other things while you're talking."