Team Of Skilled Craftmen Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

235 Results for Team Of Skilled Craftmen

View 1 - 10 results for team of skilled craftmen comic strips. Discover the best "Team Of Skilled Craftmen" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #construction bid, #award for job, #team of skilled craftmen, #ex wife, #truck on fire

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert holds a piece of paper and says, "Your construction bid is the lowest so I have to award you the job." Dilbert asks, "When can your team of highly skilled craftsmen begin?" The beaver responds, "I'll call you." The beaver is leaning over a huge book titled, "Excuses." He says into the telephone, "Day one: My ex-wife set my truck on fire."

View more books now

Selfish Team Player

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Selfish Team Player - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #hypocrisy, #team, #semantics, #flaw, #personality disorder, #success, #selfish, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: If being selfish is necessary for success, how can I claim to be a team player? Wally: I like to use a tool called hypocrisy. Asok: That is actually a character flaw. Wally: Oh. No wonder people are so prickly about it.

Team Building Lunch

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Team Building Lunch - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #lunch, #team, #teamwork, #team-building, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Is everyone ready to go to lunch yet? I've been waiting for ninety minutes. Alice: We just got back. No one noticed you weren't with us. Dogbert: How was your team-building lunch? Dilbert: Suboptimal.

Team Building Dance

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Team Building Dance - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #team-building, #dance, #rules, #restrictions, #Fun

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: This year's team-building event will be a dance. No alcohol will be served. The event is for employees only, and you're not allowed to touch each other. Have a great time. Dilbert: How?

Zoom Team Building

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Zoom Team Building - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #team, #building, #session, #zoom, #drink, #heavy, #home, #absurd, #gift, #purchase, #laptop, #video call

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: on friday we'll be having a team building session on zoom. you are welcome to drink heavily because you will already be home. dilbert: i don't know how that could be more absurd. boss: and buy a gift for yourself.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #annoyance, #critics, #idea tried, #failed misarably, #skilled at implementing, #evaluating, #insulting

View Transcript

Transcript

Coworker says, "Your idea has already been tried by others and it failed miserably." Dilbert says, "Were those other as skilled at implementing ideas as you are at evaluating them?" Coworker says, "Of course they were!" Dilbert says, "Can you tell him to stop insulting himself?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business ethics, #inefficiencies, #kaizen team, #soultions, #busy, #being ineffcient, #ignorance, #aggressive type of objectivity

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: I noticed some inefficiencies in another department, so I formed a Kaizen team to find solutions. I asked some of the peopl in that department to be on the team, but they were busy being inefficient. With any luck, my ignorance of their function will be seen as an aggressive type of objectivity.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #cruelty, #destructive criticism, #dumb, #employees, #team, #hired, #meeting, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I'd like to begin the meeting by giving Dilbert some destructive criticism. Everything you do is dumb. I don't know why I hired you. I feel much more motivated now. If you feel a little bit worse, we came out ahead as a team.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #engineers, #squirming, #team players, #thwart inaction

View Transcript

Transcript

Co-worker: Why are all the engineers in this meeting squirming when I talk? Did your boss order you to act like team players during this meeting and later thwart me by inaction? Answer me!

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #skilled, #possessions, #vaccum, #mercy, #beg, #watch, #dog

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert asks a man with a mohawk and an eyepatch, "Why are you loading our possessions into your van?" The man replies. "Easier to vacuum." Dogbert says, "I must warn you, I'm a skilled watch dog!" Dogbert stands in the driveway and says, "I'm going to watch you until you BEG for mercy!" The man thinks, "I hate this."