Technology Gone Bad Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for Technology Gone Bad

View 1 - 10 results for technology gone bad comic strips. Discover the best "Technology Gone Bad" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #training cd, #gone bad, #brainwashing, #cyborg, #brain washed

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert, Asok, and Wally are eating lunch. Asok says, "My training CD has gone bad. It is brainwashing me to become a cyborg." Dilbert responds, "Don't worry. Smart people such as you can't be brainwashed to do stupid things." Asok has transformed into half cyborg. He approaches Dilbert and says, "Guess who doesn't know the first thing about brainwashing."

View more books now

Emotionally Manipulative Robot

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Emotionally Manipulative Robot - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #evil, #manipulation, #manipulative, #manipulative behavior, #robot, #technology gone bad, #upgrade, #killing machine

View Transcript

Transcript

The Emotionally Manipulative Robot. Robot: People who are not losers buy memory upgrades for their robots. Only upgrade me if it's what you want. But if you don't, there's a very good chance I'll turn into a killing machine. Man: I guess I'll upgrade. Robot: I'm okay either way. It's totally up to you.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business ethics, #wages, #saved company millions, #no bonus, #ceo plans, #500 million, #acquisitions, #go team, #money

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Alice, your great work this year saved the company $10 million. But I can't give you a bonus because our CEO plans to write down $500 million for acquisitions gone bad. Go team!

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #integrate, #bad technology, #idiot boss, #good etchnology, #throw away, #bad tech, #pure veil

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits at a desk with a computer on it. Dogbert sits atop the computer. Dilbert says, "It's my job to integrate the bad technology that our idiot boss bought with the good technology we already own. Your advice?" Dogbert waves his arms in the air, "Throw away the bad technology. Goof off until the next planned upgrade of the good technology. Tell your boss the improvements are a result of his brilliant buying decision." Dilbert says, "Wow. That's almost pure evil." Dogbert says, "You're welcome."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #outsourced sales, #elbonian company, #complex technology, #bad string, #call back, #mud pile

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says to Wally and Dilbert, "We outsourced our sales and fulfillment functions to an Elbonian company." Wally looks at Dilbert as Dilbert asks, "Um... Are you sure that's the best way to sell complex technology?" Three Elbonians and a pig each are holding a tin can with string to their ears. One Elbonian says, "Could you call back? We have a bad string."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Wally, #the boss, #bad, #technology, #day, #phone, #freezing, #printer, #working, #network, #warning, #lights, #christmas, #tree, #laptop, #boot, #coincidence, #permission, #lock, #lead-line, #box, #hero

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: I'm having a bad technology day. My phone keeps freezing, my printer isn't working, and our network is down. Wally: My car's warning lights look like a Christmas tree, and my laptop won't boot up. Maybe its all just coincidence but I don't think we can take that chance. May I have permission to lock myself in a lead-lined box to protect the rest of the company? The Boss: How will I know you're really in a lead-lined box? Wally: YOu'll know because your phone will be working fine. The Boss: My phone is still working that man is a hero.

Bad Attitude

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Bad Attitude - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #technology, #work, #exceptional, #complain, #attitude, #bad, #dislike, #sarcasm

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: your work has been exceptional, but people are complaining about your attitude. dilbert: aren't the people who are doing the complaining usually the ones with bad attitudes. boss: they think you dislike them. dilbert: i do, but i have a terrific attitude about it.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #brainstorm, #discussion, #less effective, #meetings, #new product ideas, #stem cell technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Let's brainstorm new product ideas. Remember, the most important rule of brainstorming is no criticizing. Dilbert: I'll go first. Research shows that brainstorming is less effective than people working by themselves and later comparing ideas. My idea is to use stem cell technology to design bosses who aren't ignoramuses. Remember, you're not supposed to criticize ideas. But if you decide to do it anyway, it sort of proves my point. I understand whey brainstorming has a bad reputation, but it doesn't stop me from enjoying it.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Wally, #computer, #obsolete, #engineers, #down, #technology, #curve

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says to Wally and Ted, "I'm so mad . . . I just bought a new computer and it's already obsolete." Wally replies, "Don't feel bad. The other engineers won't look down on you just because you're behind the technology curve." Ted says, "Yeah, we will." Wally replies, "Not right in front of him."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #computer screen, #drivers side window, #interpersonal skills, #stupid person, #windshield gone, #without rolling eyes, #yugo

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert sits on a stool and Dilbert sits in a chair. Dogbert says, "This lesson in interpersonal skills involves listening to a stupid person without rolling your eyes." A man says, "My computer screen says, 'Press any key to continue.' Can I borrow your keys? Mine are locked in my Yugo." Dilbert covers his eyes and thinks, "Must focus . . . Must . . . Focus . . ." The man says, "I could break the driver's side window . . . But it's bad enough that the windshield is gone."