dogbert: i started doing telemedicine in my spare time.
Dilbert: don't you need to be a doctor to do that?
dogbert: technically, yes. but i found a workaround.
dilbert: which is?
dogbert: i tell people i'm a doctor.
patient: doctor, i have a sharp pain in the back of my thigh.
dogbert: are you sitting on a rake?
patient: that's a weird question. oh. wait, i am. what should i do?
dogbert: try picking up leaves with your hands.