Dogbert sits in the chair watching television. A voice says, "You've heard the 'other' tire company imply that your child's safety depends on its product . . ." The announcer continues, "That's nothing. If you don't buy OUR tires your whole stinkin' extended family will croak!!!" The announcer continues, "And don't get too attached to the family dog, either. Ha ha ha ha ha!!"
Wally says to the Boss, "I don't understand how the new reorganization will help us 'focus on our core business.'" Wally continues, "Did our core business change? Or are you saying that EVERY reorg prior to this was a misdirected failure?" The Boss asks hypothetically, "Wally, when a car gets a flat tire, what do you do?" Wally answers, "Well, if I'm you, I rotate the tires and drive home."
Investigative Reporter. A reporter and cameraman follow The Boss out of the building. The reporter says, "Explain why your company dumps garbage in the park." The Boss climbs into his giant car. The reporter continues, "And why do you drive such a huge, wasteful vehicle?" The Boss approaches Asok and says, "I need you to scrape something off my tires and take it to the park."
"The weather is getting worse. Maybe we should close the office."
"No."
"The forecast is blizzards, freezing rain, tsunamis, deadly lava flows, and precision-guided ball lightning."
"And radiation enlarged swarms of killer bees."
"Get some snow tires, you big baby."
Ratbert: I'd like to buy some snow tires for a refrigerator.
CLerK: "This is a lingerie store. Get lost before I stomp on your tail."
Ratbert: "I think I debunked the theory that the customer is always right."
