Total Idiot Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

189 Results for Total Idiot

View 1 - 10 results for total idiot comic strips. Discover the best "Total Idiot" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 15, 2005's comic on:

Tags #return frisbee, #doesn't fly, #software cd, #total idiot, #users manual, #poorly written

View Transcript

Transcript

"I'd like to return this Frisbee (TM). It doesn't fly right." "This is a software CD. Only a total idiot would think it was a Frisbee (TM)." "In my defense, the user's manual was poorly written." "Plus you're a total idiot."

Average Idiot

Thank you for voting.
Average Idiot - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 17, 2019's comic on:

Tags #budget, #business, #office, #user interface, #idiot

View Transcript

Transcript

the boss: did you read my suggestions on the user interface? dilbert: yes, but we'll need a bigger budget if you want to make the user interface so easy that even you can use it. the boss: just make it so the average idiot can use it. dilbert: we did, but we didn't anticipate any below-average idiots.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 18, 2011's comic on:

Tags #happiness, #ignorance (knowledge), #idiot, #health benefits, #social stigma, #healthy, #transition, #psychology

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I'm considering becoming an idiot so I can get the health benefits of happiness. It comes with a social stigma, but that's not a problem if I'm not aware that I'm an idiot. I feel healthy today, so there's a good chance I already made the transition. Dogbert: Yep.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 05, 2011's comic on:

Tags #embarrassment, #frustration, #like an idiot, #simple solution, #stumping dilbert, #gladly explin, #look like an idiot

View Transcript

Transcript

Man says, "There is a very simple solution to the problem that is stumping Dilbert." Man says, "I will gladly explain it to him after this meeting." Dilbert says, "You're probably wrong, and yet you still made me look like an idiot." Man says, "I win!"

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 02, 2011's comic on:

Tags #annoyance, #computers & peripherals, #office equipment, #servers down, #holdup, #iterated by idiot, #guard door, #don't see guy

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: The servers are down. Dilbert: I know. Boss: You should do something about it. Dilbert: I'm trying. Boss: What's the holdup? Dilbert: I keep getting interrupted by an unhelpful idiot. Boss: Maybe I can help. I'll guard your doorway and keep that guy away from you. This is boring. And I don't see that guy. Have I managed enough for now? Dilbert: You nailed it.

Dilbert Characters

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 05, 2011's comic on:

Tags #embarrassment, #obliviousness, #hired consultant, #less confident, #overconfident people, #don't recognize mistakes, #didn't know studies, #feel like idiot

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I hired a consultant to teach us how to be less confident. Dilbert: Is that because research has shown that overconfident people don't recognize their own mistakes? Boss: Now I feel like an idiot because I didn't know about those studies. Dogbert: I did him first.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 11, 2011's comic on:

Tags #meetings, #office workers, #focus areas, #sense of humor, #dumb enogh, #misunderstood man, #angry idiot, #selling it

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: These are our 25 focus areas for next year. Asok: Ha ha! Good one. Sometimes I think you have no sense of humor and then zing! What? Dilbert: I think it's real. Asok: It can't be real. No one would be dumb enough to think we can focus on 25 areas. Don't worry. I've got this. This misunderstood man is a brilliant comedian. He is only pretending to be an angry idiot. You're totally selling it.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 23, 2012's comic on:

Tags #fraudulent analysis, #total betrayal, #shareholders, #rational beghavior

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I finished the fraudulent analysis you requested to support the decision you already made. It's a total betrayal of shareholders and a slap in the face for anyone who values rational behavior. Boss: Thanks. That's exactly what I wanted. Dilbert: You're welcome.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 19, 1991's comic on:

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #five, #letter, #Word, #idiot, #five-letter, #will, #Crossword, #puzzle

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and Dogbert sit at the table doing a crossword puzzle. Dilbert says, "What's a five-letter word beginning with 'I' . . ." Dilbert continues, "That means 'an idiot who doesn't know a five-letter word for idiot that starts with "I"?'" Dogbert replies, "Idiot." Dilbert asks, "Will that fit?"

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 24, 1994's comic on:

Tags #talking, #glowing terms, #flaming idiot, #dynamite

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: "Shhh." Wally: "We were just talking about you, sir...in glowing terms." Dilbert: "He's a flaming idiot." Wally: "One stick of dynamite - it's al I ask."