Trigger Automatic Promotion Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

78 Results for Trigger Automatic Promotion

View 1 - 10 results for trigger automatic promotion comic strips. Discover the best "Trigger Automatic Promotion" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #trigger automatic promotion, #be that employee, #part of team, #not special

View Transcript

Transcript

I need to have one more direct report and it will trigger an automatic promotion for me. "Your job is to be that employee." "How's it feel to be part of the team?" "Not as special as I'd hoped."

View more books now

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #less prodcutive, #automatic promotion, #hiring, #work like idiot, #look like idiot, #pointy haired alice

View Transcript

Transcript

"Alice, I need you to be less productive." "I'll get an automatic promotion if I can justify hiring one more direct report." "If I'm going to work like an idiot, I might as well look like one."

Title Promotion

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Title Promotion - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #technology, #recognition, #outstanding, #work, #pandemic, #title, #Promotion, #stupid, #raise, #ungrateful, #engineer

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: dilbert, in recognition of your outstanding work during the pandemic, i'm giving you a promotion. dilbert: i don't want a stupid title. i want a raise. what's my new title? boss's voice through phone: "ungrateful engineer."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #office workers, #hard work, #lateral promotion, #new job, #old job, #money involved, #saving it

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I'd like to reward you for your hard work by giving you a lateral promotion. I was going to hire from the outside, but I realized I can make you do the new job plus your old one. Dilbert: Is money involved? Boss: Yes! I'm saving a ton of it!

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #anger, #envy, #big promotion, #congratulations, #not jealous, #good work, #art of full body lying

View Transcript

Transcript

Ted: Hey, Alice! Did you hear about my big promotion? Alice: Congratulations, Ted. I'm not jealous at all. Keep up the good work. Sorry about my face. I haven't mastered the art of full-body lying.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #the boss, #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #Promotion, #criticism, #mule-stomped, #gopher, #bald guys

View Transcript

Transcript

A man at a desk says to Dilbert, "Well, Dilbert, you seem qualified for this promotion, but I have one concern. Since your work would be evaluated by many people . . ." The man asks, "Can you handle criticism?" Dilbert says, "Oh, easily. For example, your toupee looks like a mule-stomped gopher . . ." Back at home, Dilbert tells Dogbert, ". . . Turns out it was a trick question." Dogbert says, "Boy, you can't trust those bald guys."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #sonic, #obliterator, #invention, #hair, #trigger, #office, #truck, #yard, #Dilbert

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits at his desk holding his invention. Dogbert asks, "May I play with your 'Sonic Obliterator' invention?" Dilbert answers, "Sure." Dilbert says, "Just be careful. It has a hair trigger and can blow a truck to bits." Dogbert says, "Neat!" Dilbert turns toward the reader and says, "You have to show them that you trust them." Dogbert says, "I'll be down at the post office truck yard."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #annual, #review, #accomplishment, #invention, #automatic, #dentures, #long, #pause, #asleep

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert stands in front of the dresser mirror tying his tie and Dogbert sits on the bed watching. Dilbert says, "My boss is giving me my annual review today." Dilbert sits across from the Boss's desk. The Boss reads and document and says, "Your biggest accomplishment was the invention of automatic dentures?" Dilbert replies, "They can eat while you're asleep." Dilbert thinks, "This long pause could mean anything."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #lab, #model, #automatic, #dentures, #program, #eat, #meat, #loaf, #asleep, #boss, #johnson

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and the Boss stand in the laboratory. Dilbert says, "This is the first lab model of automatic dentures." Dilbert explains, "You can program them to eat a meat loaf for you while you sleep . . . Quite a little time saver." Inside the lab, the Boss asks, "Weren't you working with Johnson?" Dilbert replies, "Ooh . . . Bad news about Johnson, sir."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #widow, #johnson, #missus, #devoured, #automatic, #denture, #invention, #building, #laugh

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert stands at a woman's door and asks, "Are you Widow Johnson . . . Uh, I mean 'Missus' Johnson?" Dilbert says, "I'm afraid your husband was devoured by the automatic denture invention we were building." Dilbert continues, "Some day we'll look back at this and laugh." The woman looks shocked.