Turn Down Opportunity Comic Strips
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757 Results for Turn Down Opportunity
View 1 - 10 results for turn down opportunity comic strips. Discover the best "Turn Down Opportunity" comics from Dilbert.com.
Sunday January 01,
2012
Tags #big business, #business ethics, #executive program, #relocate, #vindictive, #stress, #loser, #turn down opportunity, #train, #discomfort, #underlings
Transcript
Boss: You've been selected for our executive development program. That means we can make you relocate to any godforsaken dirt stain we want. As soon as you make friends or find romance, we'll move you to someplace new and worse. It won't be the sort of work you'll enjoy, and the stress might kill you. If you turn down this opportunity, the company will forever label you as a loser. If you accept the offer, the company will train you to find pleasure in the discomfort of your underlings. I'm doing it right now! Dilbert: I HATE MY LIFE!!! Boss: Yes, yes, say more.
Wednesday November 23,
2016
Turn Down Service
Tags #pun, #wordplay, #hotel, #turn-down
Transcript
Dilbert: I'd like to decline your turn-down service tonight so I can have some privacy. Voice: We're going to do it anyway. Good luck finding your stuff after we randomly move it. Dilbert: What? You can't do that! I hereby turn down your turn down of your turn-down service! Voice: Say goodbye to your phone charger!
Saturday December 23,
1989
Tags #Dilbert, #toll booth, #radio, #car, #toll taker, #social
Transcript
Dilbert drives his car and thinks, "Uh-oh . . . Toll booth ahead. Turn down the radio . . . Get exact change ready . . ." Dilbert stops at the tooth booth and says to the toll collector, "Good morning!" Dilbert drives away thinking, "I wonder if it's normal to want the toll-taker to like me."
Sunday July 31,
2005
Tags #alice, #boss, #car call, #diustarcted, #made distracted, #driving, #crashed
Transcript
Rrring! Alice : Now what? This is alice. Jo its your boss. alice: GAAA! its a car call. he's using me toenetratin himself while he's sitting in traffic Boss: How everything? Alice: I'll lose and hour of my life if I don't get him off the phone, Boss: Nice weather today. Alice: Do me a favor and look in your brief case to see if my latest report is there. The boss: Okay. The boss: and turn down your radio so Ic an hear you...and check your calendar on you pda GAA!!! CRASH! IM going to hell.
Thursday November 12,
2015
Boss's Charisma Inspires Wally
Tags #technology, #text, #texting, #distraction, #shout, #diversion, #charm, #excitement, #cheer
Transcript
Boss: (types on his phone). Wally: Go team! Can you turn down your charisma? I can barely sit still over here.
Thursday September 20,
2001
Tags #music in offcie, #can't concentrate, #turn it down, #drive you nuts, #complain, #cubicles, #separation, #desks
Transcript
Dilbert leans over the cubicle wall and says, "Could you turn off the music? I can't concentrate" to the coworker next to him. The coworker replies, "How about if I turn it down to a level where it still drives you nuts but you're too shy to complain a second time?" Dilbert says, "Thank you." The coworker says, "It might creep up over time."
Saturday July 27,
1991
Tags #Dilbert, #Wally, #woman, #self deprication, #utter, #turn, #silly, #hard
Transcript
Dilbert walks down the office hallway and thinks, "Forgot my keys." Dilbert thinks, "I'll have to slap my forehead and mutter when I turn around, otherwise I'll look silly." As two people watch, Dilbert smacks himself and his glasses fly off his head. Dilbert thinks, "Too hard."
Sunday July 21,
1991
Tags #Dilbert, #cop, #ticket, #u-turn, #murderers, #thugs, #taxes, #mustache, #police brutality, #police, #sobreity, #test
Transcript
Dilbert drives his car. He hears a siren behind him and thinks, "Police?" The officer stands at Dilbert's window and says, "You made an illegal U-turn." Dilbert says, "You're giving me a ticket for THAT?! A measly U-turn?!" Dilbert says angrily, "I can't believe it! The world is full of murderers and thugs, but you stop ME?" Dilbert says, "I'm wasting my taxes on your salary!" Dilbert continues, "And frankly, those mustaches you guys all grow don't make you look any smarter." The policeman says, "Please step out of your car for the sobriety test." Dilbert arrives at home wearing dirty and torn clothing. He tells Dogbert, ". . . So, it turns out that the sobriety test involves flinging yourself down a muddy embankment."
Saturday August 25,
2001
Tags #awkward, #couch, #green, #lights on, #meet new girlfreind, #save energy, #smooch, #turn lights, #dinosaur
Transcript
Dilbert and his girlfriend are sitting on the couch. Dilbert asks, "Do you mind if I turn off the lights to... um... save energy?" She replies, "I'm green with that." The lights are off. There are only sounds of kissing: "Mmm.. smooch smooch." "Smooch smooch." Dilbert's girlfriend turns on the light to find Dilbert on top of Bob. Bob says, "I came down to meet your new girlfriend but now I think it'll be awkward."
Saturday January 18,
2003
Tags #radiating aura, #extreme incompetence, #turn off, #minute to cool
Transcript
The Boss: "Wally, could you.." Wally turns; he has a dotted bubble around his body. The Boss continues, "Oh.. never mind, I see that you're radiating an aura of extreme incompetence." Dilbert, Alice, and Wally are eating lunch. Dilbert says to Wally, "You forgot to turn off your aura." Wally responds, "It takes a minute to cool down."