Tyranny Of Thinking Comic Strips
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440 Results for Tyranny Of Thinking
View 1 - 10 results for tyranny of thinking comic strips. Discover the best "Tyranny Of Thinking" comics from Dilbert.com.
Saturday March 08,
2014
Tags #choosing, #thinking, #tests, #orange buttons, #more clicks, #than green, #lost faith, #human intelligence, #green looks better, #liberated, #tyranny of thinking
Transcript
Dilbert: Our A-B tests show that orange buttons get 13% more clicks than green. I have now officially lost all faith in human intelligence. Boss: Stick with the green. It looks better. Dilbert: Sure. I feel liberated from the tyranny of thinking.
Wednesday January 13,
2016
Charging Client For Thinking
Tags #thinking, #engineers, #time, #worth, #meetings, #billing, #money, #cost
Transcript
Boss: The client says you billed them for all the time you spent thinking about their project. Dilbert: I'm an engineer. Thinking is what I do. Should I think less? Boss: Maybe you could meet with someone while you think. Dilbert: How's that working right now?
Saturday June 11,
2011
Tags #boredom, #despair, #mind numbing tesk, #stop thinking
Transcript
Asok: I can't wait to finish this mind-numbing task... so I can start another mind-numbing task. I really need to stop thinking.
Friday November 25,
2011
Tags #retail business, #service business, #buy company's prodcut, #pulling teeth, #commissions to salary, #free from tyranny, #customer service, #less than ideal, #no paperwork
Transcript
Dilbert: I want to buy your company's product but it's like pulling teeth with you. Man: Ha ha! I switched from commissions to a guaranteed salary. I'm free from the tyranny of customer service! Dilbert: This is less than ideal. Man: No paperwork for me! Woot! Woot!
Saturday December 31,
2011
Tags #celebrations, #new year's day, #happy new year, #oxytocin drug dealer, #magical thinking, #space time continuum
Transcript
Woman: Happy New Year! Dilbert: Whoa! Settle down. I don't celebrate the magical thinking that says one random point in the space-time continuum is somehow special. Woman: It's just a hug. You'll enjoy it. Dilbert: You're like some sort of Oxytocin drug dealer.
Sunday February 05,
2012
Tags #boss, #business lunch, #employee, #freedom from tyranny, #lunch, #talk work, #waddle, #waddle away
Transcript
Boss: That restaurant was great. Dilbert: I know. I plan to go there someday for lunch. Boss: We just ate lunch. Dilbert: That wasn't lunch. Boss: It wasn't? Dilbert: You talked about work the entire time. Lunch is not defined by food. It's defined by freedom from tyranny. My lunch hour will begin the minute you waddle away. Was this going well until I said "waddle?"
Friday December 08,
1989
Tags #Dogbert, #thinking, #dustin hoffman, #dog, #mirror, #fur, #zipper, #rock
Transcript
Dogbert sits outdoors thinking, "Sometimes I feel like I'm just an actor on the cosmic stage of life." Dogbert thinks, "Maybe I'm Dustin Hoffman in a doggie costume." Dogbert thinks, "I better find a mirror and check my fur for a zipper."
Thursday September 19,
1991
Tags #Dilbert, #man, #rectangles, #heard, #boss, #geometry, #major, #good, #thinking, #geography, #rectangle, #states
Transcript
Dilbert sits at a conference table with several people. The man next to him whispers, "What's your presentation going to be about?" Dilbert replies in a whisper, "Rectangles. We heard the Boss was a geometry major." The man says, "Good thinking. But I heard he was a geography major, not geometry." Dilbert points to a rectangle projected onto the wall and says, "Wyoming: one of the many rectangular states."
Friday September 08,
1995
Tags #thinking, #quitting, #contract emplyee, #Advice, #sleep in doorways, #hunk of coradboard, #co workers, #food stamps, #not edible
Transcript
Alice sits at her desk with her back to Wally. Wally asks, "Alice, I'm thinking about quitting and becoming a contract employee. Do you have any advice?" Alice replies, "Sleep in doorways so it doesn't rain on you. The best shopping carts are at 'Lucky.' You can make an excellent sign with black marking pen and a hunk of cardboard." Wally walks away from Alice's cubicle and says, "I hate all of my co-workers." Alice says, "Despite the name, food stamps are NOT edible."
Saturday September 09,
1995
Tags #outside the box, #creative design, #push chair, #hallway, #view point, #stimulate, #fire hazard, #thinking, #inside box
Transcript
Dilbert sits in his cubicle thinking, "I need to think 'outside the box' to come up with a creative design . . ." Dilbert pushes his chair outside his cubicle and continues thinking, "I push my chair into the hallway to change my viewpoint and stimulate my creative juices." The Boss approaches and Dilbert thinks, "Suddenly my juice dries up." The Boss points at Dilbert and says, "You're a fire hazard. Do your thinking inside your box."