Unicorn Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

16 Results for Unicorn

View 1 - 10 results for unicorn comic strips. Discover the best "Unicorn" comics from Dilbert.com.

Dating A Unicorn

Thank you for voting.
Dating A Unicorn - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 28, 2019's comic on:

Tags #business, #dating, #office, #office workers, #unicorn

View Transcript

Transcript

ted: i hear you're dating a unicorn. dilbert: that is absurd and untrue. ted: then how do you explain the fact that five people told me it was true? ted: i mean, you'd have to believe all five of them are idiots. dilbert: including you, it's six.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 17, 2012's comic on:

Tags #actions & defenses, #billion dollars, #business ethics, #golden key, #rich people, #top 1%, #flying unicorn

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Here's a billion dollars to settle your claim of discrimination against short, bald, nearsighted guys. Wally: I'm in the top 1% now. I wonder where we hold our secret meetings. Boss: Ask the tiny flying unicorn with the golden key.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 07, 1992's comic on:

Tags #Dilbert, #transferred, #market, #work, #barbecue, #tuesday, #lunch, #unicorn

View Transcript

Transcript

A man holding a drink and wearing a robe and a wreath of leaves on his head says to Dilbert, "You look lost." Music plays in the background. Dilbert says, "I never knew that marketing was like this . . . Do you people do any work?" The man replies, "Well, not on 'Barbecue Tuesday.' Are you staying for lunch? It's unicorn!"

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 08, 1992's comic on:

Tags #Dilbert, #transferred, #marketing, #barbeque, #unicorn, #rare, #best, #part

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert stands in a barbecue line holding a plate. The man in front of him says, "Every Tuesday we barbecue a unicorn." The man says, "Make mine rare. Ha ha! Get it? Rare?" Dilbert looks at the horn on his plate and thinks, "I'm not sure I believe this is the 'best part.'"

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 18, 1998's comic on:

Tags #unicorn horn, #Dilbert, #date, #sign of virility

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert is on a dinner date. Dilbert has a unicorn horn growing from his forehead. The date's eyes are wide from shock. Dilbert says, "Lately, I've been growing a unicorn horn." Dilbert says, "In some cultures, this would be a sign of great virility." The date has left Dilbert alone at the table. Dilbert thinks, "It's time to admit that I don't know what women want."

Dilbert Characters

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 10, 2001's comic on:

Tags #animals dna, #clone one, #dont finish, #eating burgers, #elbonian unicorn, #save unicorn dna

View Transcript

Transcript

An Elbonian is holding a tin can tied to a string to his ear. The Elbonia says, "I'm sad to report that our drilling has caused the extinction of the Elbonian unicorn." The boss, at his desk, is on the phone. The boss says, "Save a sample of the animal's DNA so we can clone a new one." The Elbonian with the tin can turns to another Elbonian, who is eating a burger. The first Elbonian says, "Don't finish that."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 07, 2004's comic on:

Tags #elbonian call center, #software in stock, #wear pants, #porcelain unicorn

View Transcript

Transcript

Elbonian Call Center "We don't have that software in stock." "But may I interest you in a set of porcelain unicorn figurines that wear pants?" "Really? Wow. Your country has way too much money."

Ted's Unicorn Startup

Thank you for voting.
Ted's Unicorn Startup - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 19, 2016's comic on:

Tags #success, #failure, #gloating, #start-up

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Too bad your overhauled unicorn start-up failed, Ted. Last week you were a billionaire, and today you're doing a two-hour commute to work in a box. Ted: What can I do to make this stop? Dilbert: Earn a billion dollars.

Absurd Absolute

Thank you for voting.
Absurd Absolute - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 25, 2018's comic on:

Tags #software upgrade, #idiot, #absurd absolute, #admit when wrong, #eaten unicorn

View Transcript

Transcript

You're an idiot if you think the software upgrade will solve every one of our problems. Dilbert: Or are you an idiot for characterizing my reasonable idea as an absurd absolute? Why cant you admit when you're wrong? Dilbert: Same reason you've never eaten a unicorn.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 18, 2012's comic on:

Tags #clubs, #meetings, #rich people, #tiny flying unicron, #commodities, #1% club, #imagination, #Entertainment

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: A tiny flying unicorn gave me this key. Guard: Grab a snout and a hat. We're just about to manipulate the commodities market. Wally: Is it my imagination or everything a little bit better here?