Wife Comic Strips
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65 Results for Wife
View 1 - 10 results for wife comic strips. Discover the best "Wife" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday June 08,
2016
Dilbert Cheats On His Work Wife
Tags #work, #wife, #wives, #adultery, #cheating, #criticism, #nagging, #anger, #marriage, #roles, #relationships
Transcript
Alice: There' s rumor that you're cheating on me with another "work wife." Dilbert: I let Tina criticize me a little. But I swear it didn't mean anything. And... she makes me look for her lost keys. Alice: I knew it!
Friday June 10,
2016
Dilbert Breaks Up With Work Wife
Tags #Women, #wives, #wife, #work spouse, #game, #scam, #ruse, #relationships
Transcript
Dilbert: Alice, I am breaking up with you as my work wife. Tina complains less and she sends me on fewer errands, so I choose her. Alice: What's your game? Tina: I'm running a bait-and-switch on him.
Thursday October 13,
2016
Boss Wants Alice To Be His Work Wife
Tags #wife, #spouse, #work, #creep, #relationships, #repulsive
Transcript
Boss: I decided to call you my work-wife. Alice: Gurk. I"m creeped out! I'm creeped out! I'm creeped out! Boss: Just like at home. Alice: I need a shower.
Friday October 14,
2016
Tina Agrees To Be Work Wife
Tags #spouse, #wife, #insult, #mean, #game, #obliviousness, #relationships
Transcript
Boss: Alice doesn't want to be my work-wife. How about you? Tina; As your work-wife, would I be able to jokingly insult you in front of the others? Boss: Sure, ha ha! Tina: Okay, I'm in. Now run along, you ignorant sack of wet fertilizer. Boss: This is fun!
Tuesday May 29,
2018
Wife Versus Wifi
Tags #typo, #overreaction, #wife, #wi-fi, #offense, #relationships
Transcript
CEO: I want you to fire Dilbert for insulting my wife in his slide deck. Boss: The presentation was about wi-fi, not your wife. CEO: In my defense, they're both spotty.
Monday August 22,
2011
Tags #commerce, #new software vendor, #form realtionship, #take money, #ex wife
Transcript
Man: I'm your new software vendor. I'm here to form a relationship with you. That way it will be easy to take half of your money. Dilbert: Does that ever work? Man: It worked for my ex-wife.
Monday April 09,
2012
Tags #Family, #work from home, #2 days err week, #reduce carbon foorprint, #wife, #small children, #egg carton, #talking to moron, #relationships
Transcript
Boss: I want you to work from home for two days per week to reduce our carbon footprint. Employee: Nooooo! My wife and three small children are in that house. They're always mean to me. Boss: How bad could it be? Employee: Let me put it this way: I'm sitting in an egg carton and talking to a moron, and this is better.
Wednesday April 17,
1991
Tags #Dilbert, #work, #clothes, #talented, #Family, #sews, #hate, #wife, #marriage
Transcript
A man in a strange shirt says to Dilbert, "My wife sews all of my work clothes. She's the talented one in the family." Dilbert looks at the man's oddly shaped shirt. Dilbert asks, "She hates you, doesn't she?" The man says, "Why do you ask?"
Friday March 12,
1993
Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #insult-o-gram, #ex-wife, #weather, #satellites, #photograph, #cloudy, #people, #recognize, #tipping, #situation
Transcript
A man answers his door and asks, "Yes?" Dogbert says, "I have a Dogbert Insult-O-Gram from your ex-wife . . ." Dogbert says, "You're so ugly, weather satellites won't photograph your town unless it's cloudy." Dogbert says, "The smarter people recognize this as a tipping situation."
Thursday April 13,
1995
Tags #blame the media, #blow out proportion, #dispappear, #human nature, #third wife, #Wally, #free replacements
Transcript
Dogbert, Wally and Dilbert sit around a conference table. Dogbert says, "You could offer free replacements for all the keyboards you sold without a 'Q,' or you could blame the media for blowing it out of proportion." Wally says, "Let's blame the media. They'll admit they were wrong and the whole thing will disappear." Dogbert says, "You have a brilliant grasp of human nature, Wally." Wally responds, "I know. My third wife always said the same thing."