Winning Argument Important Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

287 Results for Winning Argument Important

View 1 - 10 results for winning argument important comic strips. Discover the best "Winning Argument Important" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #fast email, #boss confused, #priorities, #program compiling, #weasel, #Dilbert, #ignore email, #winning argument important

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss sits at his desk in front of his computer, looking at his watch. The Boss says, "What the...?" The Boss goes into Dilbert's cubicle and says, "You respond too quickly to my e-mail." The Boss continues, "Obviously, you aren't focusing on priorities." Dilbert turns and replies, "I do e-mail while my program is compiling." The Boss says, "You can't weasel out of this with your technical mumbo jumbo." Dilbert says, "You win. I'll ignore your e-mail from now on." The Boss walks back to his office and thinks, "The important thing is that I win." The Boss sits in front of his computer and thinks, "I wonder if MY programs ever compile."

View more books now

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #anger, #email, #facts, #link to study, #Right, #science, #scientific study, #winning an argument

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: I got your stupid email with your stupid link to that stupid scientific study. I don't care about your so-called "facts." I know I'm right! Dilbert: Winning an argument never feels like winning.

Winning The Bid

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Winning The Bid - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bidding, #executives, #lying, #outsourcing, #projects, #winning bid, #good news, #secretly subcontract, #scream, #presentation

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: The good news is that we had the winning bid for the project. The less-good news is that we don't make the product we just sold, nor could we make it for the price we bid. My plan is to put out an RFP to secretly subcontract the work to a bigger liar. CEO: That could work.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #fraternization, #joking, #agenda, #know anything, #important he is, #like his jokes, #late for dinner, #jokes, #table, #meeting, #laughter, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: The first thing on the agenda... Dilbert: Hold on. I don't know anything about this guy. Boss: What's the difference? Dilbert: I need to know how important he is. Should I pretend to like his jokes? Should I nod in agreement no matter what he says? Man: You can call me anything. Just don't call me late for dinner. Dilbert: Ha ha ha ha ha!! I hope I didn't waste that.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business ethics, #stock market, #hedge fund, #million dollars, #insider trading, #algorithm, #winning trades, #create algorithm, #eat fiber, #money

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: I'll pay you a million dollars a year to work at my hedge fund. I'll do the insider trading and you pretend you created an algorithm that makes winning trades. Dilbert: What if I actually create the algorithm? Dogbert: Sure, and maybe you can eat fiber and make gold, too.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #ruler, #argument, #flaw

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits at his desk holding up a broken ruler. Dilbert asks Dogbert, "Dogbert, do you know what happened to my good ruler?" Dogbert answers, "Rulers are made to be broken." Dilbert stares at Dogbert. Dilbert turns back to the desk and says, "I just KNOW there is some flaw in that argument . . ."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #juggling, #Dilbert, #game, #play, #winning

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert sits on the hassock. He hears, "Boink-ouch! Boink-ouch! Boink-ouch!" Dogbert gets off the hassock and walks toward the noise. Dilbert lies face-down on the floor with juggling pins around him. Dogbert says, "Maybe juggling isn't your sport." Dilbert says, "It's not winning that counts; it's how you play the game."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #urget, #memo, #employees, #important, #competitive, #proactive, #quality, #items, #pounding, #tingly, #day, #off

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits at his desk reading a memo. Dilbert reads, "Urgent memo to all employees:" Dilbert says, "Uh-oh. Looks important." Dilbert continues reading, "If we are to remain competitive, you must proactively improve quality on all actionable items!" Dilbert says, "Wow! That was inspiring. My heart is pounding. I'm all tingly . . . I'd better take the rest of the day off . . ."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #important, #part, #serves, #two, #tennis, #racket

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert holds a tennis racket and tosses a tennis ball. The instructor says, "Good. The toss is the most important part of . . ." Dilbert misses the ball and it bounces on his head. Dilbert brings his racket down on the instructor's head. Dilbert asks, "Is this why you get two serves?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #robot, #discriminating, #female, #years, #compensate, #past, #injustices, #therefore, #argument, #effective

View Transcript

Transcript

A female robot says to Ruebert, "Males have been discriminating against females for a million years." Ruebert thinks, "Guilt attack." The female robot says, "Therefore, YOU must compensate ME for past injustices." Ruebert says, "You know, for a ridiculous argument, it's nonetheless quite effective." The female robot says, "Thank you."