Won't Know Blind Fold Comic Strips
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1000 Results for Won't Know Blind Fold
View 1 - 10 results for won't know blind fold comic strips. Discover the best "Won't Know Blind Fold" comics from Dilbert.com.
Sunday September 26,
2004
Tags #blindfold, #carbs, #cublicle, #heinous crime, #put new guy, #won't know blind fold, #finance troll
Transcript
HECK were out of space boss. we've had a big upswing in people who use cell phone is bathrooms. Dang, Ive got a new guy coming in today, where will I put him? Maybe you could ask your brother,,, HMM... The boss: well, I suppose you could put hum in a cubicle. his crime wasn't that heinous, well, if you blind fold him, he won't know he's in a cubicle. so then I find pout its not okay to eat carbs.
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Wednesday August 23,
2000
Tags #pay slip, #increased complexity, #won't know, #rip off, #clueless, #in the dark, #happy to be evil, #cheat, #evil catbert
Transcript
Catbert the Evil HR Director says to the staff, "We increased the complexity of your pay slip." Catbert yells, "Now you'll never know when we rip you off! Yeeha! Yeeha!" Dilbert says to Wally, "The only part that really bugs me is the yeehas."
Wednesday August 06,
2003
Tags #description, #projected course, #impossible, #uncertainty principle, #understand project, #know cost
Transcript
"I need a description of your project and its projected cost." "That's impossible." "The project uncertainty principle says that if you understand a project, you won't know its cost, and vice versa." "You just made that up." "That doesn't make it wrong."
Thursday June 09,
2011
Tags #absent mindedness, #computers & peripherals, #unix servers, #new servers, #new names
Transcript
Wally: This week I renamed all of the Unix servers to make them easier to remember. In phase one, the new names exist only in my mind. I won't know if they're easy to remember until next week. Dilbert: How are the new server names? Wally: I don't know what you're talking about. Next week.
Monday January 15,
1990
Tags #Dilbert, #school, #teacher, #dog, #fourth grade, #coincidence
Transcript
Dilbert asks Dogbert, "You what?!" Dogbert replies, "I got a job as a substitute school teacher." Dilbert says, "You aren't qualified to be a teacher. You're a dog." Dogbert replies, "Little kids won't know the difference." Dilbert says, "You do remind me a bit of my fourth grade teacher." Dogbert asks, "Just a coincidence?"
Saturday December 09,
1995
Tags #inexplicable, #low cost, #system, #underpowered, #replace, #another vendors, #upgrade fees, #big a fool, #lease option
Transcript
The Boss and Dogbert sit at a conference table. Dogbert says, "It's inexplicable, but the low-cost system I sold you seems to be woefully under-powered." Dogbert continues, "You could replace it with another vendor's system, thus showing everybody you make a mistake. Or you can pay my outrageous upgrade fees." The Boss asks, "How big a fool do you think I am?" Dogbert replies, "I won't know until I see if you go for the lease option."
Friday October 10,
2008
Tags #solar panels, #investors, #ham sandwhich, #assured stupidity
Transcript
The Boss says, "Our investors want to see the solar panels you invented." Dilbert says, "I didn't invent any solar panels." The Boss says, "Show them something else. They won't know the difference." A man says, "It looks like a ham sandwich." Dilbert says, "I was assured that you're stupid."
Tuesday October 27,
2009
Tags #asking, #bonus, #project, #explaining, #pandemic
Transcript
Asok says, "If I do a great job with the pandemic contingency planning, can I have a bonus?" The Boss says, "I won't know if you did a great job unless we actually have a pandemic emergency." Asok says, "So?if there is a pandemic, I might get a bonus?" The boss says, "I don't like where this is heading."
Sunday January 29,
2006
Transcript
"I'll need to know your requirements before I start to design the software." "First of all, what are you trying to accomplish?" "I'm trying to make you design my software." "I mean what are you trying to accomplish with the software?" "I won't know what I can accomplish until you tell me what the software can do." "Try to get this concept through your thick skull: The software can do whatever I design it to do!" "Can you design it to tell you my requirements?"
Saturday July 05,
2014
Tags #inventions, #artificial intelligence, #software, #phb test, #hide, #html5, #talking, #engineering
Transcript
Dilbert: My artificial intelligence software passes the PHB test. That means I can hide it behind a curtain and people won't know if they're talking to a computer or a pointy-haired boss. Computer, what is HTML5? Computer: Beats me. Boss: I was going to say that!