Wounded Rodent Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

15 Results for Wounded Rodent

View 1 - 10 results for wounded rodent comic strips. Discover the best "Wounded Rodent" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 06, 2006's comic on:

Tags #asok, #survival methods, #indian institutet of technology, #wounded rodent, #tickle hawk, #find highway

View Transcript

Transcript

I must use the survival methods I learned at the Indian Institute of Technology. "Step one: Pretend to be a wounded rodent." "Now look for the highway and tickle the hawk with its own feather."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 01, 1990's comic on:

Tags #Dilbert, #uncle, #picture, #eleven, #purple, #hearts, #william, #wounded, #times, #war, #warfare

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and Dogbert sit on the couch looking through a photo album. Dilbert says, "Here's a picture of my uncle just before he was drafted. He was awarded eleven purple hearts." Dogbert asks, "He was wounded eleven times?!" Dilbert replies, "Uncle William insisted that his friends call him 'Will' . . ." Three soldiers kneel in a trench. A commanding officer yells, "Okay, men, fire at will!!" and the other soldiers look at Will.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 31, 1990's comic on:

Tags #Dilbert, #rat, #mickey, #rodney, #rodent, #bill, #vernon, #vermin, #ratbert, #arm chair, #table

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert says to a rat, "If you're going to live here, you need a name." The rat asks, "How about 'Mickey?'" Dogbert replies, "No . . . Big trouble. How about 'Rodney the Rodent?'" The rat asks, "How about 'Bill the Rat?'" Dogbert asks, "Vernon the Vermin?" The rat says, "Ratbert."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 13, 1994's comic on:

Tags #annoying rodent, #cutest briefcase, #following to work, #ratbert, #work to engineer, #career in marketing

View Transcript

Transcript

Ratbert walks behind Dilbert who is carrying a briefcase. Ratbert says, "I'm following you to work." Ratbert continues, "I'll start out as an annoying rodent but with hard work and training I'll work my way up to engineer." Dilbert says, "May I suggest a career in marketing?" Ratbert holds up his tiny briefcase and says, "Is this the cutest little briefcase or what?!"

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 26, 1996's comic on:

Tags #department newsletter, #high profile assignment, #technical writer, #intern and rodent, #spats page, #raise based, #topless model

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss, Tina the Tech Writer, Asok the Intern and Ratbert sit at a conference table. The Boss says, "I want you three to write the department newsletter. It's an important, high-profile assignment." Tina says, "I am an experienced technical writer. You have placed me on a project with an intern and a rodent." Tina continues, "MY next raise will depend on THEIR performance." Asok says, "I'll do the sports page!" Ratbert says, "I'll be the topless model on page two."

Dilbert Characters

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 03, 1996's comic on:

Tags #corporate vice presdient, #win bet, #action plan, #spend money, #vice president, #annoying rodent

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert says to Ratbert, "Remember everything I taught you, Ratbert. If you can pass yourself off as a corporate vice president, I'll win my bet." Ratbert stands on a desk and says to Wally as he walks by, "Yo, Headcount! If you have any issues, put together an action plan. Our people are the best. Don't spend money." Wally asks Alice, "Do you think he's really a vice president?" Alice answers, "Maybe. But I'm not ready to rule out 'annoying rodent' yet." In the background Ratbert says, "Quality."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 05, 1996's comic on:

Tags #valuable experince, #rodent, #vice president of marketing, #simple marketing plan, #good press

View Transcript

Transcript

Ratbert, Wally, Dilbert and Alice sit at a conference table. Ratbert says, "I had years of valuable experience as a rodent before I became vice president of marketing." Ratbert continues, "My marketing plan is simple. Each of you will cling to the leg of a technology columnist until we get some good press." Dilbert approaches a technology columnist and says, "It looks like you're full." The man has people clinging to both legs. He responds, "You can cling to the cat until a space opens."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 19, 2000's comic on:

Tags #house on fire, #servant, #killing spiders, #wounded flies, #work at home person says, #what family hears

View Transcript

Transcript

(What the work-at-home person says.) Dilbert says to Dogbert and Catbert, "Don't disturb me unless the house is on fire." (What the rest of the family hears.) Dilbert continues, "I am your servant. My speciality is killing spiders." (What the spiders hear.) Dilbert says, "The house is full of wounded flies."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 15, 2010's comic on:

Tags #customer support, #customer service, #rodent, #talk on phone, #creepy personal questions, #waste of time, #refund

View Transcript

Transcript

Ratbert's customer support Ratbert says, "You're speaking to a powerless rodent." Ratbert says, "My job is to prevent you from getting to anyone who is authorized to give refunds." Ratbert says, "I'd like to begin by asking you some creepy personal questions."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 18, 2010's comic on:

Tags #noisy bag of chips, #speaker phone, #common sense, #wounded ego, #guy on speaker phone

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says, "Maybe it's not a good idea to eat a noisy bag of chips next to a speaker-phone." Dilbert says, "Uh-oh. My common sense has wounded your ego and made you defiant." Asok says, "Did you really think he would stop?" Dilbert says, "No. I hate the guy who was on the speaker-phone."