Wrong Context Comic Strips
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"I'm trying to make him lose his language skills." "I've been using words in the wrong context and waiting for him to adopt them." "Carol, could you truculent this doctrinaire to the obelisk?" "Cervically."
Tina: People keep telling me you refuse to admit when you are wrong. Dilbert: It only looks that way because Im right most off the time and people are too dumb to know it. Tina: wow! They're right about you being a narcissist, too. Dilbert: I refuse to admit I'm wrong about this.
Dilbert: I offered to help a co-worker, and she started delegating tasks to me like I'm her subordinate. Dogbert: Is the point of your boring story that your co-worker is a natural leader and you're a wimp. Dilbert: I was looking for some empathy. Dogbert: Is your point that you look for things in the wrong places?
dilbert: i think you're wrong. co-worker: what error did i make? dilbert: i'm basing my decision on your entire career of being wrong about everything. i hope i'm not the first person to point that out. co-worker: give a minute to reassess my entire life.
co-worker: i don't like what you wrote about my project, so i took one of your quotes out of context, to make you look dumb, and sent it to your boss. dilbert: that won't work, because once i explain the proper context, he will see there is nothing to it. later that day. dilbert: ...so, as you can see, that quote was out of context. boss yelling: liar!!!
dilbert: i have a feeling you are doing something wrong, but i don't know what. do you mind if i watch over your shoulder and look for mistakes as you make them? coworker: you don't have friends, do you? dilbert: i like to travel light.
The Boss says, "We can learn from our mistakes. Let's make a list of the things that each of you did wrong this year." Dilbert says, "It is just a coincidence that our annual performance reviews are due next week?" The Boss says, "It would have been the stuff of management legends." Catbert says, "Very nice try."
The boss: How hard would it be to program our website to collect browser history from our visitors? Dilbert: well, first Id need to invent some sort of device that reverses my sense of right and wrong. The Boss: so...we we talking about a week ...or a month?
Company Lawyer Dilbert says, "I signed a software contract without getting your input because I was in a hurry." Dilbert says, "Now the software company claims they can harvest my organs." Dilbert says, "Do you see any holes in their contract?" Lawyer says, "They mention holes... in the context of your torso."
Dilbert: Do you have a minute? Boss: I'm on my way to a meeting. Follow me. We'll walk and talk. Dilbert: I don't see how this can possibly work. You can barely concentrate when you're sitting perfectly still. When you add the extra complexity of walking, it's like asking a squirrel to land a 747. Boss: Must... prove underling... wrong... Noise: BONK! Dilbert: I didn't know that being right could feel so good.