1991 Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #two-bean, #salad, #smothered, #island, #dressing, #bench

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and Dogbert sit on a bench. Dilbert says, "I was so poor that all I could afford to eat was two-bean salad." Dogbert replies, "Sounds awful . . ." Dilbert says, "It wasn't that bad . . ." Dilbert continues, ". . . Of course, I always smothered it with hundred island dressing."

Top Dilbert Searches

marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #book, #moby dick, #metaphors, #imagery, #whale, #smell, #armchair

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and Dogbert sit at a table. Dilbert asks, "Well? What do you think of my book so far?" Dogbert looks at the manuscript and says, "It reminds me of 'Moby Dick.'" Dilbert asks, "Because of my creative metaphors and strong imagery?" Dogbert responds, "No, it just seems to me that a big whale wouldn't smell too good, either."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #murder, #forever, #safe, #optimist, #pessimist, #1957, #due

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits in a chair reading the newspaper and Dogbert sits on Dilbert's legs. Dilbert says, "Our town hasn't had a murder since 1957." The caption says, "Definition of an optimist." Dilbert thinks, "We're safe forever." The caption says, "Definition of a pessimist." Dogbert thinks, "We're due."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #sliced, #bread, #invented, #unsliced, #Dilbert

View Transcript

Transcript

Great Grandad Dilbert. Dilbert: I'll call my invention "sliced bread." Dogberto! Look what I've invented! Dogbert: Sliced bread? Dilbert: This is the greatest thing since... Uh... Since... Uh... Dogbert: Unsliced bread?

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #volkswagen, #car accident

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert enters looking dazed and Dilbert asks, "Dogbert! What happened to you?" Dogbert replies, "I was hit by a Volkswagen." Dilbert bends down and asks, "Does it hurt?" Dogbert says, "I feel like fahrvergnugen."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #the boss, #dead, #targets, #power-hungry, #managers, #career, #shooting

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert stands in front of the Boss's desk and says, "Boss, I have an idea." The Boss gasps. The Boss jumps up and says, "Quick! Close the blinds! I'll get the door!" The Boss shouts, "You fool! If anybody heard you, we're both dead!" The Boss continues, "Don't you realize that ideas are just targets for other power-hungry managers?!!" The Boss continues, "I've based my entire career on shooting down other people's ideas." A brick crashes through the window. Dilbert picks it up and says, "The note says, 'We know you have an idea in there. Give it up.'" Dilbert arrives at home wearing disheveled clothes and bent glasses. Dogbert asks, "How was work?" Dilbert replies, "Same ol' same ol'."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #judy, #dog, #blind, #dates, #fetching, #flowers, #woman

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert holds a bouquet of flowers as he rings a doorbell and thinks, "I'm always nervous on blind dates." A dog in a dress answers the door and says, "Hi, I'm Judy! You must be Dilbert." Dilbert says, "Hi . . ." Judy asks, "How do I look?" Dilbert replies, "Um . . . fetching."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #woman, #trapped, #dog's, #body, #operation, #electrolysis, #costs

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and a dog in a dress sit at a table in a restaurant. Dilbert thinks, "That is absolutely the LAST blind date." Judy says, ". . . Then I realized . . ." Judy continues, "I'm a woman trapped in a dog's body . . . So, now I'm saving for a species change operation." Dilbert asks, "Is it expensive?" Judy replies, "Well, you can imagine the electrolysis costs alone."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #judy, #blind, #date, #woman, #friends, #Dogs, #body, #dog, #dating

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says to Judy, "To be honest, Judy, I wouldn't have agreed to this blind date . . ." Dilbert continues, ". . . If I had known you were a woman trapped in a dog's body." Judy, a dog in a dress, looks sad. Judy says, "Oh, right, and this is the part where you say 'Let's be friends, but maybe I could pet you sometimes.'"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #kiss, #question, #gracefully, #blind dating, #love, #dog, #animal behavior

View Transcript

Transcript

Judy, a dog in a dress, says to Dilbert, "I guess a good night kiss is out of the question." Dilbert throws a stick and says, "Fetch!" Judy turns to follow the stick. Dilbert leans against the door and says, "That ended more gracefully than most of my dates."