"The Boss: I can't give you the highest raise because you didn't exceed expectations."
Dilbert: "If you thought it was possible for me to exceed my expectations, you would have set the goals higher."
"So there are only two possibilities here." "Either you are incompetent at setting goals..." "Or I attained the maximum possible achievement and I deserve the maximum raise."
"Which is it?"
The Boss: "Can I hear those two choices again?"