Dilbert: I offered to help a co-worker, and she started delegating tasks to me like I'm her subordinate.
Dogbert: Is the point of your boring story that your co-worker is a natural leader and you're a wimp.
Dilbert: I was looking for some empathy.
Dogbert: Is your point that you look for things in the wrong places?
Dilbert: How can I help you on your project?
Woman Employee: I'll send you my files and you can do all of my work while I criticize you behind your back.
Dilbert: Is there another option?
Woman Employee: Yes, it' involves telling your boss you're worthless.
Dilbert: Our pointy-haired boss asked me to help you on your project.
Woman Employee: Yes!! My dream of getting paid while other people do my work is becoming a reality!
Dilbert: I might have played this wrong.
Woman employee: Sucker!